Saturday afternoon at the cottage was, for the most part, uneventful. I raked up some 6 wheel-barrows full of leaves from the underbrush and painstakingly picked 2 large buckets of white, decorative garden stone out of a patch of dirt I wanted to plant some flowers in while hubs tackled one of the biggest tree stumps on the lot. This took him the better part of 4 hours of hacking, sawing, leveraging, sweating and swearing….but he finally won and the offending stump was removed and banished to the empty lot across the end of the driveway.
A little later, I was inside getting some refreshments (lemonade, cause we worked so hard and you just know lemonade quenches thirst better than beer…or is it the other way around?), anyway, hubby comes in and says we have company walking up the driveway…who is it I asked? Not a who, he said…it’s a what!
So I grab the camera and head outside and immediately hear a long string of loud and non-stop quacking… so I head up the driveway, and sure enough, a female mallard was incessantly quacking and waddling up our driveway…
I imagine she was out looking for Mr. Mallard, who I am sure had headed over to the Moe-Zee-On-Inn that is just a 20 minute drive around the bay. By the way, if you are not familiar with the North Bay area, the Moe-Zee-On-Inn is a ‘less than reputable’ place of ahem….”dancing ladies”….
No wonder Mrs. Mallard was so upset….
CASE:
Detouring Duckie Divorce.
Mr. Mallard has since agreed to refrain from said establishment, however he is insistent that he was merely discussing work with the neighbouring male fowl in the only available atmosphere where the females don`t demand constant attention or completion of “to-do lists“.
Mr. Mallard has suggested that the entertainment offered in this facility is actually non interfering to his “shop talk“ with the boys as the ladies there refuse to acknowledge the discussion or the participants unless sums of money are exchanged.
Regardless that Mr. Mallard, and his neighbour fowl, didn`t have any excessive finances available to them at that time, *( due to having recently purchased long grasses and decorative spikes for the family pond area and providing for the stability security of the surrounding dam and its officers )*, He has persuaded that to pay a she-foUl for attention would defeat his, and his neighbouring buddies initial intentions, which were to avoid female conversation and property maintenance responsibilities.
Along with the admission of familial avoidance, Mr. Mallard and his attending workmates have made great efforts to atone their poor decisions and irresponsible behaviours of that day.
Mrs. Mallard and the local pond wives have had their companionship needs, home maintenance and parental involvement requirements substantially provided for since this incident.
Justice of The Pond, Sir Speckled Frog, presided over this emotionally charged, heated and potentially catastrophic issue.
Sir Speckled Frog has officially Ordered that Dam security will now prevent the male fowls from accessing any financing without express written permission of their mates, which shall include a shopping list be shown prior to the release of funds.
Little Minnow , Reporting for the Lilly Pad Court, Freshwater Division.
😛
LOL!!!! …..you scare me Becks….:P